Thoughts from the Dirty City

I have been thinking about the upcoming New Year quite a bit lately, more so than I would like to admit. I have been looking back over the last years (years) and deciphering what it is about my life that needs changing. What issues need resolved. I know this is nothing new, and in fact almost everyone starts to spend a bit more energy pondering the rearview mirror this time of year.

But what is it about that day that gets people all in a tizzy? Why is it so important to so many people? I think that perhaps it all comes down to hope. New Years gives people the opportunity and permission to wipe the slate clean. To go forward hoping that they wont make the same mistakes or give up so easily. Honestly, the whole thing has started to really bug me.

Sure there is plenty of stuff that I would like to change about my life. Plenty of things about myself I would like to improve. But what is it about that day that makes me believe I am going to be able to make these magical over night changes in my life. Like some how turning a page on the calendar is suddenly going to give me the courage and self discipline to make changes that I have wanted to make for years.

So this year (actually just this moment) I have decided not to make any resolutions (well, more over to take back those things I decided to resolve to do). Not entirely though. I am not going to give up on improving my self, or striving to make my life better. I am just not going to rely on a calendar to give me the will to make the changes. There is no magic in that moment when the glowing ball of lights finally hits the bottom of the tower. No magic in the cheering and well wishes for a new year. Nothing really changes in those few moments. If the changes are going to come, they are going to come from me, from a place that has always been here. And to be frank, the changes come anyway. Good or bad, fast or slow, if life is defined by one thing it is change.

A good friend of mine recently said that they are resolving to “keep on keeping on” (or something to that effect). To that, I say rock on. Making changes is hard, and takes lots of effort and time. Who needs the pressure of trying to make it all happen overnight?

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