Is there anything worse than being sick on days when the weather is perfect and the sun is shining? Yes, plenty worse I imagine…but it still sucks. Yesterday I woke up with a fever. It felt like the blood was boiling in my veins. Even my eyes felt sweaty and hot. Thankfully whatever had worked its way into my system worked its way out pretty quick. Aside from a little bit of ick, I’m feeling pretty good.
Though I’m kinda wishing I would have been sick again today. If I had been sick again this morning I wouldn’t have come in to work. Had I not come in to work, I would not have had a fourth run in with the giant cockroach office inhabitants. I realize that few people like bugs. I would wager most hate them. I on the other hand have an irrational fear and loathing for them. Especially cockroaches and centipedes.It’s going to be weeks before I can be comfortable at my desk again. And months before I’m comfortable leaving anything personal in my desk for fear of it becoming infested. (Like I said, irrational – I know – but I can’t help it).
And here I thought I was doing so much better with this whole bug phobia. All my hikes and outdoor adventures were supposed to take the edge off this. Turns out – not even a little better. Just as off my rocker freaked out by them as ever. Bugs are gross. Cockroaches, doubly so. Especially the giant ones I encounter here. Like something in a zoo exhibit giant. GROSS.
An attempt to kill said cockroach was made. I spotted it and decided I needed something heavy to kill it (actually I went to find someone else to kill it, but no one would – so plan B was to find something heavy to kill it to avoid any actual contact). Weapon in hand I approached, and found it had escaped. The only think worse than seeing a cockroach, is knowing one is near and not knowing where. In my head, it was now EVERYWHERE.
Phobias are so weird. I know logically that there is nothing a cockroach can do to me. And in turn all I have to do is swat and stomp and it’s little life is over. Still, the sight of one sends me running and screaming (literally). By my reaction you would assume it could spit poisoned venom across the room. No matter how much I can rationalize that they are in no way dangerous, I still have the same gut wrenching reaction of terror. So silly. I really do need to just get over it already. (Never gonna happen)
*If I ever find I am not allergic to cats – I will get three and that will be their names.